Thinking sheet

Questions to think about:

Print this sheet off and write your ideas in the spaces. You can print this sheet from your browser (by pressing the 'print' button on the toolbar or selecting 'print' in the File menu) or, if you have MS Word 6.0 or higher you can download a copy to use.

• Write a list of the ways in which you think your boyfriend/girlfriend has been or is being abusive towards you. (See the relationship warning signs quiz for some examples)

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• What does your boyfriend/girlfirend gain through their behaviour? ___________________________________________________________________________
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• How has the abuse made you feel?

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• How does or has the abuse affected you - how has it affected your confidence, your relationships, and your life in general?

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• How have the negative messages that your boyfriend/girlfriend has given you made you feel about yourself?

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• How have you been able to not let the abuse overwhelm you completely?

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If you break up:

Good points / what could I gain

• ________________________________
• ________________________________
• ________________________________
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Bad points / what could I lose?

• ______________________________
• ______________________________
• ______________________________
• ______________________________
• ______________________________
• ______________________________
• ______________________________

If you stay in the relationship:

Good points / what could I gain

• ________________________________
• ________________________________
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• ________________________________

Bad points / what could I lose?

• _____________________________
• _____________________________
• _____________________________
• _____________________________
• _____________________________
• _____________________________
• _____________________________
• _____________________________
• _____________________________

• What's your worst fear if you leave?

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• What's your worst fear if you stay?

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• Who can you talk to who could help?

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• What personal strengths do you have to help you keep going?

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• What are some steps you will take to try to change this situation?

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• What can you do to feel safer (either in the relationship or after breaking up)

(see ideas in The Safety Plan)
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• What things can you do for yourself, to feel stronger? (eg: spend more time with my friends, keep a journal, etc) See ideas that may help.

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